I spoke to our young people today on being friendly. Here is the biblical foundation of what I shared. I find it so helpful to simply look at what the bible teaches about friendship. These scriptures always leave me wanting to be a better friend and show me the way to do so. Blessings, Leonard
QUALITIES OF A GOOD FRIEND
THEY FEAR GOD:
Psalm 119:63 I am a friend to all who fear you, to all who follow your precepts.
THEY ARE GOD'S FRIEND:
John 15:14 You are my friends if you do what I command.
James 2:23 And the scripture was fulfilled that says, "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness," and he was called God's friend.
THEY LOVE GOD'S PEOPLE AND MINSTER TO THEM UNSELFISHLY:
3 John 1:5 Dear friend, you are faithful in what you are doing for the brothers, even though they are strangers to you.
THEY LAY DOWN THEIR LIVES FOR THEIR FRIENDS:
John 15:13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.
THEY LOVE TO SHARE ABOUT THE THINGS OF GOD WITH THEIR FRIENDS:
Jude 1:3 Dear friends, although I was very eager to write to you about the salvation we share, I felt I had to write and urge you to contend for the faith that was once for all entrusted to the saints.
THE BEST FRIENDS ARE PURE-HEARTED AND GRACIOUS IN SPEECH:
Proverbs 22:11 He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend.
THEY ARE CAREFUL IN THEIR CHOICE OF FRIENDS:
Proverbs 12:26 A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Proverbs 13:20 He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.
THEY ARE NOT HOT TEMPERED:
Proverbs 22:24 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered,
THEY ARE CONSISTENT IN THEIR LOVE OF THEIR FRIENDS:
Proverbs 17:17 A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.
Proverbs 18:24 A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
THEY DESIRE TO HAVE FELLOWSHIP WITH THEIR FRIENDS:
3 John 1:14 I hope to see you soon, and we will talk face to face. Peace to you. The friends here send their greetings. Greet the friends there by name.
Psalm 55:13 But it is you, a man like myself, my companion, my close friend, 14 with whom I once enjoyed sweet fellowship as we walked with the throng at the house of God.
THEY MAKE COMMITMENTS THEY WILL KEEP WITH THEIR FRIENDS:
1 Samuel 20:42 Jonathan said to David, "Go in peace, for we have sworn friendship with each other in the name of the LORD...
THEY SHARE THEIR LIVES IN AN INTIMATE WAY WITH THEIR FRIENDS:
Exodus 33:11 The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend. Then Moses would return to the camp, but his young aide Joshua son of Nun did not leave the tent.
John 15:15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.
THEY GIVE WISE COUNSEL TO THEIR FRIENDS:
Proverbs 27:9 Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel.
THEY WILL WOUND THEIR FRIENDS FOR LOVE'S (PHILEO) SAKE:
Proverbs 27:6 Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
THEY WARN THEIR FRIENDS TO FLEE FROM SIN:
1 Corinthians 10:14 Therefore, my dear friends, flee from idolatry.
THEY ENCOURAGE THEIR FRIENDS TO LIVE IN HOLINESS:
2 Corinthians 7:1 Since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.
THEY REJOICE WITH THEIR FRIENDS IN THEIR REJOICING:
Luke 15:4 "Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? 5 And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders 6 and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, `Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.' ...8 "Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Does she not light a lamp, sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? 9 And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, `Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.'
THEY STAND WITH THEIR FRIENDS IN TIMES OF ADVERSITY:
Proverbs 27:10 Do not forsake your friend and the friend of your father, and do not go to your brother's house when disaster strikes you-- better a neighbor nearby than a brother far away.
Job 6:14 "A despairing man should have the devotion of his friends....
THEY HAVE PITY ON THEIR FRIENDS:
Job 19:21 "Have pity on me, my friends, have pity, for the hand of God has struck me.
THEY WILL WEEP WITH THEIR FRIENDS:
Judges 11:37 But grant me this one request," she said. "Give me two months to roam the hills and weep with my friends, because I will never marry."
THEY KEEP SECRETS ABOUT THEIR FRIENDS REVEALED CHARACTER FLAWS:
Proverbs 17:9 He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.
THEY INTERCEED FOR THEIR FRIEND
Job 16:20 My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; 21 on behalf of a man he pleads with God as a man pleads for his friend.
Job 42:10 After Job had prayed for his friends, the LORD made him prosperous again and gave him twice as much as he had before.
3 John 1:2 Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.
THEY DO NOT RESPOND TO THE GOOD THEIR FRIENDS SHARE WITH EVIL:
Psalm 109:5 They repay me evil for good, and hatred for my friendship. (negative example)
THEY DO NOT RECEIVE OR SPEAK EVIL GOSSIP CONCERNING THEIR FRIEND:
Proverbs 16:28 A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.
THEY DO NOT MAKE FALSE ACCUSATIONS:
2 Samuel 3:8 Abner was very angry because of what Ish-Bosheth said and he answered, "Am I a dog's head--on Judah's side? This very day I am loyal to the house of your father Saul and to his family and friends. I haven't handed you over to David. Yet now you accuse me of an offense involving this woman!
THEY RESPOND IN LOVE (AGAPE) TO THOSE WHO FAIL THEM IN FRIENDSHIP:
Psalm 109:4 In return for my friendship they accuse me, but I am a man of prayer. (negative example)
THEY RESPOND TO NEEDS OF THOSE BEYOND THEIR CIRCLE OF FRIENDSHIP WITHOUT THOUGHT OF PERSONAL GAIN:
Luke 14:12 Then Jesus said to his host, "When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. 13 But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, 14 and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous." 15 When one of those at the table with him heard this, he said to Jesus, "Blessed is the man who will eat at the feast in the kingdom of God."
THEY DO NOT MAKE FRIENDS FOR THE SAKE OF MONEY OR WHAT THEY MAY RECIEVE IN THE FRIENDSHIP MATERIALLY:
Proverbs 19:4 Wealth brings many friends, but a poor man's friend deserts him... 6 Many curry favor with a ruler, and everyone is the friend of a man who gives gifts. 7 A poor man is shunned by all his relatives-- how much more do his friends avoid him! Though he pursues them with pleading, they are nowhere to be found.
THEY TAKE CARE OF THEIR FRIEND'S NEEDS:
Acts 24:23 He ordered the centurion to keep Paul under guard but to give him some freedom and permit his friends to take care of his needs.
Acts 27:3 The next day we landed at Sidon; and Julius, in kindness to Paul, allowed him to go to his friends so they might provide for his needs.
THEY SEEK TO EXTEND THEIR FRIENDSHIP TO THEIR FRIEND'S CHILDREN:
1 Kings 5:1 When Hiram king of Tyre heard that Solomon had been anointed king to succeed his father David, he sent his envoys to Solomon, because he had always been on friendly terms with David.
Job 29:4 Oh, for the days when I was in my prime, when God's intimate friendship blessed my house,
THEY SEEK THEIR FRIEND'S ADVANCEMENT AS WELL AS THEIR OWN:
Daniel 2:49 Moreover, at Daniel's request the king appointed Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego administrators over the province of Babylon, while Daniel himself remained at the royal court.
THEY SEEK THEIR FRIEND'S HELP:
- IN WEAKNESS:
Ecclesiastes 4:10 If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!
- IN NEED
Ecclesiastes 4:11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?
- IN DEFENCE
Ecclesiastes 4:12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
- IN SPIRITUAL REVELATION
Daniel 2:14 When Arioch, the commander of the king's guard, had gone out to put to death the wise men of Babylon, Daniel spoke to him with wisdom and tact. 15 He asked the king's officer, "Why did the king issue such a harsh decree?" Arioch then explained the matter to Daniel. 16 At this, Daniel went in to the king and asked for time, so that he might interpret the dream for him. 17 Then Daniel returned to his house and explained the matter to his friends Hananiah, Mishael and Azariah. 18 He urged them to plead for mercy from the God of heaven concerning this mystery, so that he and his friends might not be executed with the rest of the wise men of Babylon.
THEY DO NOT FEAR WHAT OTHERS THINK IF THEY ARE FRIENDS WITH YOU:
Luke 7:34 The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and you say, `Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and "sinners." ' 35 But wisdom is proved right by all her children." 36 Now one of the Pharisees invited Jesus to have dinner with him, so he went to the Pharisee's house and reclined at the table. 37 When a woman who had lived a sinful life in that town learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee's house, she brought an alabaster jar of perfume, 38 and as she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them. 39 When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, "If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is--that she is a sinner."
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